Seriously…

Has everyone else just wondered what in the world has been going on? I mean, I have never felt this run down and beat up in my life. I literally mean it feels like my whole family has been taking fire for the last 6 months and all we have been able to do is hunker down and withstand the bombardment. The truth is, there have been times I have wanted to give up and just stop living. I have wanted to let go of everything that I have been entrusted with and just cease to exist.

Then I read a quote that has changed the way I feel about my life and the enemy attacks I have been facing. You see, I have been hanging on by a thread for the last 2 months and I have not been really sure how to survive. I feel like I may need to share a little about what has been happening.

My family has a small history of depression and anxiety that we have all battled with from time to time but in the last 6 months my father has been really struggling. I won’t go into much detail about him because that is his story to tell, not mine. I will say that we both have issues that we have been able to cope with that have suddenly been escalted over the past 6 months. The truth is, we started attending a new church about a month before this all started and I personally believe that this the reason for the assualt we have been under as a family. We had started to be really involved in the new church and I had actually started to step out and use some of the gifts that God has blessed me with. I had started graduate school and was planning on having another baby (I had finally started to loose enough weight and had my sugar under control; another post about how in later days).

I made the enemy angry. I started to do the very things that God has called me to do and has anointed me to do many years before. I promise you, all hell broke loose on my family. And, if I am totally honest, I have hid many times over this onslaught we have been facing. In fact, I finally had to go to the doctor for my anxiety and depression. Thankfully, it is being treated the same way that others in my family have been treated so I feel good about it all. And the doctor is working with me on having another baby. I have found some answers to questions I have been asking for years.

Now, back to my earlier reference to a quote that has helped more than you could ever imagine. I have been at the end of my rope for a long time over all of the things that seem to be swirling around me and that I have not been able to change no matter how hard I have tried. The origional quote says “When you are at the end of your rope, then tie a knot and hang on.” While this is sound advice, I like this one much better, “When you are at the end of your rope, make sure it is the hem of His garment.”

Pretty simple, huh? But still, so profound! The hem of his garment. For those who don’t know what I am talking about, let me clue you in. When the priest was anointed with oil in the temple, the oil started at their head andran all the way down to their feet but the bulk of the oil was caugh and kept in the hem of their garment. That is why the woman with the issue of blood knew to touch the hem of Jesus’ garment for the healing she needed. The anointing was concentrated there in the hem! So, when we get to a point in life where we have nothing left to give, we just need to hold on to the hem of his garment and believe that the same anointing that healed the woman with the issue of blood will see us through even the worst that we can face.

So, my advice for anyone today that is needing help in any area of their life to just hold on to the hem of Jesus’ garment.

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